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Get notified about breaking news on The Local. Login or Sign Up now to download this video! This was Paris in Was this page helpful? Then there is the in-between perspective—maybe in a park, hidden by trees The History of Omoide Yokocho.
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Please refresh the page and retry. Within minutes, several men had urinated in plain sight very near to us; one had clambered up on a little raised platform with some shrubbery on it just to do so.
Faced with this scene, not a taxi in sight, we walked the three-and-a-bit miles back to our flat. This was Paris in D espite its extraordinary charms, the City of Light can also feel like an anarchic, post-apocalyptic hellhole — people litter, spit and pee freely in the streets, as if the city were their personal lavatory, bin and ashtray combined. Ubiquitous dog poo only adds to the fun, while young women unlucky enough to be stuck trying to get home after hours will know that the loutish menace only intensifies with the incessant sexual harangues of the litterers and the foulers.
So what, the French might shrug? But is it? The fun may finally be over for Parisian boors. If anything, this is too lenient. Paris, like other European capitals, has a long history of filth, germs and the battle to contain them. Cholera epidemics in the s led to many attempts to make the city more salubrious.
He fined those who did not use them, and quite right too. London could do with an incivility brigade too. A literal rap on the knuckles might be the only way. We urge you to turn off your ad blocker for The Telegraph website so that you can continue to access our quality content in the future.
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A Guide to Tokyo’s Piss Alley
The story of how it got there is one of sorrow, toil and public urination. Usually, at this point in the evening, I need a wee. On this particular occasion, I really need a wee. My bladder is writing an all-caps email to social services. One of them involved getting to the buffet at a Jewish wedding. Until, that is, I get to the door and a couple of knackered looking employees are locking up. At an inhuman speed, I scope out nearby pissing spots.
One otherwise-empty side street contains a passed-out suited man in a doorway, a twinkling puddle of sick at his feet. Can I wee in front of, albeit comatose, puke-man? I make my way towards the Eros statue, under which a group of Italian teenagers are piling thundering accolades on their comrade who had both the wit and the gall to put a traffic cone on his head. I need inspiration. In the gutter, I spot a discarded pint glass. I grab the glass and make a dash down Piccadilly and hunt down the emptiest side street.
I find one sparsely dotted with tired drunks. This will do. I lift the pint glass to my crotch and, with what I thought was an impressive level of discreetness, pull my knickers to one side.
I begin to piss. Boy do I piss. In fact, I piss more than a pint. When we piss down alleys together and watch our glistening urine trails cross paths, we cement friendships. Welcome to the sisterhood. Bond-forming as it may be, using your friends as human shields while you whip out your minge in public is far from ideal. It occurs to me that the Scandinavians, of all people, must have an answer to this. You can always rely on those Scands to be socially progressive and design savvy.
Surely they must have invented some kind of sculpture-like all-night public toilet, where women can wee in peace. As you can probably imagine, my Google search was unfruitful.
Sign up. You are browsing in private mode. Far from ideal. Eleanor Margolis is a freelance journalist. Related articles. Lebanon's people are finally rejecting their country's entrenched political elite.
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